The O.J. Trial As Told By Dr. Seuss
[author unknown]

I did not kill my lovely wife.
I did not slash her with a knife.
I did not bonk her on the head.
I did not know that she was dead.

I stayed at home that fateful night.
I took a cab, then took a flight.
The bag I had was just for me.
My bag! My bag! Hey, let it be!

When I came home, I had a gash.
My hand was cut from broken glass.
I cut my hand on broken glass!
A broken glass did cause that gash.

My friend, he took me for a ride.
All through L.A. from side to side.
From north to south, we took a ride.
But from the cops we could not hide.

Did you take this person's life?
Did you do it with a knife?
I did not do it with a knife.
I did not, could not, kill my wife.

Did you do this awful crime?
Did you do it at night time?
I did not do this awful crime.
I could not, would not, anytime.

Did you hit her from above?
Did you drop this bloody glove?
I did not hit her from above.
I cannot even wear that glove.

My trial, it lasted for a year.
A year! A year! Just sitting here!
The DNA, the HEM, the HAW!
The circus hype the viewers saw.

A year! A year! Just sitting here!
The lawyers charge by the hour I fear!
If I'm found guilty I will appeal!
I'll whine and whine. I'll cut a deal!

And now I'm free, I can return.
To my house for which I yearn.
And to my family whom I love.
Now could you please return my glove?